So here I was sitting the other day, my mind doing it's usual monkey-mind thing. I had practiced my usual generation of bodhichiita, and Seven Branch Prayer, the usual things I do in my practice. First, though i open with a prayer to my teacher, and one of the things i request is "grant the blessings for the abandonment of ego clinging."And lo and behold, I saw that very thing happen. I discovered that my monkey-mind was my ego looking to bolster itself up because i was letting go of it.
Any one who tries to sit and meditate will learn that the mind likes to get real active. Particularly when you are trying to make it non-active. Well, mine as usual waits about a minute, and then off she goes. For the most part I treat thoughts like clouds moving through the sky. I just let them pass through. The other morning though I noticed something about my clouds.
I saw that my thoughts were ranging towards interests, and things i could do to improve certain aspects of myself. In other words, make the impermanent "me" more permanent. That's when the sun broke through, and I saw that it was my ego. The impermanent me, the Me of this apparent reality is really my ego, and it always tries to be permanent in a genuine reality that has no permanence. It is difficult at times to realize that as a white male, I will not always reincarnate, nor have always been born, in this white male configuration. That's how attached I am to this impermanent me. To see that though is a big step, at least for me.
So where do my thoughts range? Well, I keep an active political blog, so my thoughts range to my political views, and various web sites I want to visit or things I want to say about what I believe. I also have hobbies, and my thoughts range there as well. My thoughts range to my work, and and my ambitions in that area, or my volunteer work as a firefighter/EMT. This is the part of the Seven Branch Prayer that I like, but is a challenge. The last branch is a prayer that my merit be used to help other sentient beings, and that I become a leader of sentient beings. Being a leader involves those very ambitions, and the challenge is not being attached to that leadership position I might attain, or the honor that goes with it.
This leads me to a verse of the Dza Patrul Rinpoche's Verses on the Five Poisons Self-Liberated. Verse two says:
"Do not cling to the object of your pride, look at the clinging mind.
Clinging to oneself as best is self-arisen and self-liberated, originally emptiness by nature.
Original emptiness is nothing other than the wisdom of equality -
Within pride self-liberated, recite the six syllable mantra ( OM MA NI PE ME HUNG)"
"The wisdom of equality..." That's what I saw. I am like all other beings. My thoughts range where the thoughts of many range. My experiences are not new. To me they might be, but not unique in the universe. Human existence is not like that, otherwise it would undercut the ability of humans to have compassion. In the Christian viewpoint, it would completely usurp the mission of their Christ. Humans have very similar expediences, across the realm of time as well as across the globe. And particularly for those who are enlightened. Any buddha can help because they have been here before us.
The key here is detaching from my concept of permanence, from my interests, and my idea that I am more than equal. Not giving them up, but detaching from them. Let me use this illustration. Imagine your interest as a rock in your hand, and you are holding it, palm down. That means you need to grasp it to maintain the hold on it. The rock isn't you though. It's only in your possession. Detaching is the art of turning the hand over, and opening it. The rock is still there, but the grasping is gone. I don't identify myself by the rock of my interest, my permanence, or my status.
So I sit another day. Now I see this cloud for what it is and it seems a little bit more transparent than it was before. As I continue to sit, more clouds will become more transparent until one day, when my mind will be a cloudless blue sky
Monday, December 4, 2006
The Being of Meditation
I have discovered something, in my rookie seasons as a meditator, about the growing up of one's experience of meditation. It's based on the Supplication to the Takpo Kagyu, which is something we pray in our school, and I do every morning in my own practice. What I discovered is this being of meditation which really is a great picture not only of reality, but a great primer on the growth pattern of meditation.
The first part of the prayer is the invocation of the Kagyu lineage, and asking for their blessings. If you are part of the Kagyu lineage, then you have the right to expect their guidance in this matter. The second portion has four aspects: the feet, the head, the body, and the essence.
The first aspect is the feet. "Revulsion is the foot of meditation, as is taught. To this meditator who is not attached to food and wealth, who cuts the ties to this like, grant your blessings so that I have no desire for honor and gain."
Interestingly enough, to gain a firm foothold, one needs to detach from this world. Revulsion can also be translated as renunciation. The point is the same. To gain a foothold, some stability, and as feet the implication of mobility, or movement, one needs to check the level of attachment to this world. For example, my priorities in terms of my practice. I persoanlly like to blog. I maintain this one and two others www.gonzotruth.blogspot.com and www. whidbeyharrisons.blogspot.com. The former is a politically oriented blog, and the other a family life type journal. The political blog emerged along with my emerging political awareness, and is the better example of getting too attached to this world. It was and still is, easy to find material to blog on. But the over-investment of time leads to worry, and ego, and all the stuff that attachment is made of. And if I let it, it will take over my meditation time. So I remind myself that this political reality is just apparent reality, not genuine reality. I need to cut that tie to how important I think my small contribution to the political debate is.
The blessing one seeks in this first step is not that honor and gain don't happen, but that I have no desire for them. Karma determines whether or not honor or gain will happen, and in the Seven branch Prayer, the last stanza states, "...may I become a splendid leader of sentient beings." So it isn't against the concepts of Buddhism to have honor and wealth. We do need to be free of the desire. Desire for them is an anchor in apparent reality. To utilize that mobility meditation can give me, I need to cast off that anchor to sail freely into genuine reality.
Revulsion in itself though is a good word. Besides the verbal aspect of reminding yourself (renunciation), actually feeling the weight of apparent reality, and it's suffering, is very helpful. So to re-use my anchor metaphor, there you are on the lake, fishing, getting nothing. The sun is burning you. The one lone rain cloud drenches you, and it's lone bolt of lightning zaps the end of your rod and burns your hands. More clouds are on the horizon, and now your hands hurt, making it difficult to pull up the anchor. And oops!, that lighning also popped a couple rivets in the small boat you're in, and you're taking on water. And you're in the middle of Lake Mille Lacs, which means the neareset land is several miles away. How well can you swim? Sun burned, headache setting in, hands burned from the lighning strike, and I can't swim all that well, and a storm is approaching, making swimming difficult at best. I am feeling pain and fear. That's the idea of feeling the revulsion.
The second aspect of this body is the head. "Devotion is the head of meditation, as is taught." This stanza drives to the core of this practice. This school is a verbally oriented school. Once one has mastered the lower levels of tranquility and insight meditation, and achieved some of the basic nundro practices, and connection to the Lama, the gate is opened to enter into the teachings you won't find written down in any books. It was just this last two years that an explanation of this mahamudra practice was published by the Tibetans.
Behind this gate is a treasury, considered so for it's power to accelerate enlightenment. But the concern is what gets us there. Besides the first step, of being released from lusty desires, even for the treasury of oral instructions, then one needs to have devotion.
This is where many trip up in Buddhism. Particularly Westerners. We love our individualism, and we are suspicious of cults that demand devotion. But devotion in Buddhism is not a blind faith devotion. Buddhism is not a blind faith practice. It is a reasoned, experientially proven practice. And as the last sentence explains, the type of devotion one is after is not blind faith devotion. It is genuine devotion.
There are stories in Buddhism of monks in caves separated from their teachers who achieved higher levels of consciousness and even enlightenment because of their devotion to their teacher, despite there being no actual face-to-face connection. And that's what genuine devotion is. An ardent, profound dedication. It establishes a relationship chain that allows the power of the teachings to flow through the living teachers to the student.
The third aspect is the body. "Awareness is the body of meditation, as is taught." Now we have something that connects the head and feet! And I'll pick this up in a second post!
The first part of the prayer is the invocation of the Kagyu lineage, and asking for their blessings. If you are part of the Kagyu lineage, then you have the right to expect their guidance in this matter. The second portion has four aspects: the feet, the head, the body, and the essence.
The first aspect is the feet. "Revulsion is the foot of meditation, as is taught. To this meditator who is not attached to food and wealth, who cuts the ties to this like, grant your blessings so that I have no desire for honor and gain."
Interestingly enough, to gain a firm foothold, one needs to detach from this world. Revulsion can also be translated as renunciation. The point is the same. To gain a foothold, some stability, and as feet the implication of mobility, or movement, one needs to check the level of attachment to this world. For example, my priorities in terms of my practice. I persoanlly like to blog. I maintain this one and two others www.gonzotruth.blogspot.com and www. whidbeyharrisons.blogspot.com. The former is a politically oriented blog, and the other a family life type journal. The political blog emerged along with my emerging political awareness, and is the better example of getting too attached to this world. It was and still is, easy to find material to blog on. But the over-investment of time leads to worry, and ego, and all the stuff that attachment is made of. And if I let it, it will take over my meditation time. So I remind myself that this political reality is just apparent reality, not genuine reality. I need to cut that tie to how important I think my small contribution to the political debate is.
The blessing one seeks in this first step is not that honor and gain don't happen, but that I have no desire for them. Karma determines whether or not honor or gain will happen, and in the Seven branch Prayer, the last stanza states, "...may I become a splendid leader of sentient beings." So it isn't against the concepts of Buddhism to have honor and wealth. We do need to be free of the desire. Desire for them is an anchor in apparent reality. To utilize that mobility meditation can give me, I need to cast off that anchor to sail freely into genuine reality.
Revulsion in itself though is a good word. Besides the verbal aspect of reminding yourself (renunciation), actually feeling the weight of apparent reality, and it's suffering, is very helpful. So to re-use my anchor metaphor, there you are on the lake, fishing, getting nothing. The sun is burning you. The one lone rain cloud drenches you, and it's lone bolt of lightning zaps the end of your rod and burns your hands. More clouds are on the horizon, and now your hands hurt, making it difficult to pull up the anchor. And oops!, that lighning also popped a couple rivets in the small boat you're in, and you're taking on water. And you're in the middle of Lake Mille Lacs, which means the neareset land is several miles away. How well can you swim? Sun burned, headache setting in, hands burned from the lighning strike, and I can't swim all that well, and a storm is approaching, making swimming difficult at best. I am feeling pain and fear. That's the idea of feeling the revulsion.
The second aspect of this body is the head. "Devotion is the head of meditation, as is taught." This stanza drives to the core of this practice. This school is a verbally oriented school. Once one has mastered the lower levels of tranquility and insight meditation, and achieved some of the basic nundro practices, and connection to the Lama, the gate is opened to enter into the teachings you won't find written down in any books. It was just this last two years that an explanation of this mahamudra practice was published by the Tibetans.
Behind this gate is a treasury, considered so for it's power to accelerate enlightenment. But the concern is what gets us there. Besides the first step, of being released from lusty desires, even for the treasury of oral instructions, then one needs to have devotion.
This is where many trip up in Buddhism. Particularly Westerners. We love our individualism, and we are suspicious of cults that demand devotion. But devotion in Buddhism is not a blind faith devotion. Buddhism is not a blind faith practice. It is a reasoned, experientially proven practice. And as the last sentence explains, the type of devotion one is after is not blind faith devotion. It is genuine devotion.
There are stories in Buddhism of monks in caves separated from their teachers who achieved higher levels of consciousness and even enlightenment because of their devotion to their teacher, despite there being no actual face-to-face connection. And that's what genuine devotion is. An ardent, profound dedication. It establishes a relationship chain that allows the power of the teachings to flow through the living teachers to the student.
The third aspect is the body. "Awareness is the body of meditation, as is taught." Now we have something that connects the head and feet! And I'll pick this up in a second post!
Sunday, December 3, 2006
Let the fun begin!
This blog will be where I put my revelations along the way. But first a note about my Buddhist path.
My teacher is Lama Tashi Namgyal, and his teacher is Thrangu Rinpoche. He was also being taught by Bokar Rinpoche, who walked on last year. I am in the Kagyu school, specifically Shenpen Osel Choling, practicing mahamudra, a vajrayana practice. I am essentially a rookie, and still in the general stage of mastering tranquility and higher seeing. I suppose then I will be on to the nundro practices, and after that the verbal teachings.
So that is my current perspective. I first got interested in Buddhism when I terminated a separation between my wife and I. I was not in a good place, and she turned me on to Pema Chodron. I ate it up. Although the presence of Tibetan monks has been in and out of my life several times over the years, I never got the hint. Pema was a student of Chogyam Trunkpa, who founded Naropa Institute in Colorado. I attempted to follow in the Shambhala school, but there was no local group, and at the time that was Northfield, Minnesota. So I managed then to track down some folk who eventually started what became the Northfield Buddhist Meditation Center. It was an eclectic place, and I learned to sit Zen style because my knees and back welcome that position more than the vajra posture.
When it came time to move here to Washington, I decided to stay with Tibetan Buddhism, as it had been the most predominant form in my life. And lo and behold, the doors opened up. I find it interesting that although I love to read, and have used my knowledge and ability to remember as a defense mechanism against intimacy, that I end up in a school based on practices far removed from texts. Ironic, yet needful, so I welcome it.
My teacher is Lama Tashi Namgyal, and his teacher is Thrangu Rinpoche. He was also being taught by Bokar Rinpoche, who walked on last year. I am in the Kagyu school, specifically Shenpen Osel Choling, practicing mahamudra, a vajrayana practice. I am essentially a rookie, and still in the general stage of mastering tranquility and higher seeing. I suppose then I will be on to the nundro practices, and after that the verbal teachings.
So that is my current perspective. I first got interested in Buddhism when I terminated a separation between my wife and I. I was not in a good place, and she turned me on to Pema Chodron. I ate it up. Although the presence of Tibetan monks has been in and out of my life several times over the years, I never got the hint. Pema was a student of Chogyam Trunkpa, who founded Naropa Institute in Colorado. I attempted to follow in the Shambhala school, but there was no local group, and at the time that was Northfield, Minnesota. So I managed then to track down some folk who eventually started what became the Northfield Buddhist Meditation Center. It was an eclectic place, and I learned to sit Zen style because my knees and back welcome that position more than the vajra posture.
When it came time to move here to Washington, I decided to stay with Tibetan Buddhism, as it had been the most predominant form in my life. And lo and behold, the doors opened up. I find it interesting that although I love to read, and have used my knowledge and ability to remember as a defense mechanism against intimacy, that I end up in a school based on practices far removed from texts. Ironic, yet needful, so I welcome it.
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